i am no longer with him but not longing to be with you. my head is dizzying in different directions and my heart is sinking to my feet. where do i go? what direction do i take for this adventure? yesterday was amazing. smoking, dreaming, seeing, existing, living. i'm slowly regaining touch. i need to maintain the level of busyness that will not allow my mind to falter. unspoken rules never work. under the blanket of inebriation old mistakes and stupid desires resurface. everything seems brighter in the dark of the night. relationships get to a point where there is just too much hurt to go back. six months of hell. learning curb. no more letter j's. i am single. just one. and ready for a new take on life.
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